When
Most days, he’s still pretty happy. He is playful and quite the prankster. He is easy to giggle and tries to flirt at every opportunity. Similar to the little boy in class, pulling your ponytail for attention.
He is becoming extremely difficult to converse with, as his sentences are the textbook, word-salad. He speaks in such a manner that the question is indecipherable. Frustration is raging as we navigate to my finally understanding. But, with my clarity comes his victory because he knows his question was valid and the confusion was mine. He is happy once more.
Until his mind wonders “when”?
When do I get my drivers license back?
**Never
When will I be normal again?
**Never
When will I get to work again?
**Never
When will I get to stop taking these meds?
**Never
When will they give me my brain back?
………!
The “when’s” create angst and despair for him. Almost attached to his subconscious knowledge of the silent “never’s". He knows he’s different somehow. He knows he has Alzheimer’s. He no longer knows the gravity of what that means.
However, in the darkness of the “when’s” there is a silver lining…. Hope
Hope means he hasn’t given up. Hope means he sees his future as prosperous. Hope is a Blessing.
Cheers❤️
Love & Hugs 💔
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